


what's done in love

by whatshisface



Category: Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six (Video Games)
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-16 23:49:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29708433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatshisface/pseuds/whatshisface
Summary: How do you tell someone you care about them without having to say it? Jordan  and Marius learn they share an interest in building things, even if the end results differ. It helps them to grow closer, learn about each other, and to become better. And then a new arrival brings up some unresolved feelings. Alternatively: oh my god they were lab-mates
Relationships: Jordan "Thermite" Trace/Marius "Jäger" Streicher
Kudos: 12





	what's done in love

**Author's Note:**

> If I can't find it on the internet and I don't know how to draw, then I gotta write. that's it. I did not review this before finishing as a warning. shoutout to my enabler who brought up these two as a couple and now it won't leave my head.

Jäger finds himself in R&D when there’s downtime. He’s always exchanging notes with the other operators that come in and out of there and honestly, it’s worked out so well that Mira schedules him for extra lab time before he even tries to ask her. He's been called everything from helpful to a busybody, with nothing deterring him otherwise. He gets to run reports and learn about the interests of other operators, what's not to like?

It’s how he gets to know Thermite well. They meet when it’s late in the lab. Jäger’s decided to call it a night when he puts away his tools, but he hears something down the hall in one of the other rooms. Heading over, that’s where he finds someone on a makeshift dolly, slid underneath a vehicle that’s suspended by chains. Whoever they are, they've got a welding tool with them and the bright light that illuminates under the engine gets Jäger to turn his head away. When there's a break in it, he walks in and knocks on the open door to announce himself. 

There’s a bright flash and a swear as the lower half of the stranger jerks up, an audible thud of metal hitting metal that makes Jäger wince. Still, he watches as out slides Thermite, elbows deep in oil and grime. Sitting up, the other man lifts his hood up and wipes at his goggles before registering who it is that startled him. The back of his hand presses to his forehead, rubbing red skin. 

“Jäger? Hey, what’re you doing in here?” 

“I was about to head out when I heard— well, you.” Gesturing with both hands, he motions at the space between them, smile easy on his face as he looks over what he can see. It doesn't even take a beat before he can tell what's going on, squatting down to Thermite's level. “Are you doing some modifications?” 

“Oh, yeah! You wanna see? I figured that if—” He pulls over a second dolly for Jäger before sliding back under to show him. The offer is taken eagerly as Jäger lays back on the dolly, following after Thermite. He bumps shoulders with the man when he slides to his level, offering a grin before looking at the work done.

They make quick friends. 

───────

Not that they weren’t friendly before then— Thermite spent a lot of time with Jäger while he was recovering from that operation in New Mexico. It was on Doc's orders that he stay in the medical ward during two weeks, so that he wouldn't sneak off to R&D, or the training grounds, or anywhere that would keep him on his feet and aggravate his injuries. It had felt like torture in the first few hours after all the visitors had come by, so Thermite's face had been refreshing. He felt a little responsible, despite having no control over what had happened, but it gave them time to talk. He'd learned about Jäger's time as a pilot and in turn, Jäger found out about Thermite's experience with EODs. 

One thing would lead to another and soon enough they were talking schematics, technical details for explosives that benefited the both of them. It’d been a good time exchanging notes and making bets on who could make the better improvements. 

One night, their discussion had dragged into the night long before either of them noticed and they wound up falling asleep, papers and notebooks scattered over the bed and floor. Doc came in that morning to check on Jäger and wound up giving two lectures. The first had been to Thermite for extending himself and Jäger, then the second one followed right after, to Jäger for letting Thermite sleep in such an uncomfortable position. During the time, they'd stolen glances at each other to grin. It ended when Doc's annoyance turned to outright disappointment and anger. 

It had been worth it. They continued like that until Jäger was given the all clear. Jordan always made sure to bring good snacks from the cafeteria during that time. Jäger was able to make improvements to the Magpie, considering ideas of how it could detect shrapnel, while Thermite debated if placement of metal powder and C4 could make a more controlled explosion. Ideas like that kept them both on their toes and if something worked, well. They inspire each other to do better and in the process, they become closer as they learn more about the other. Thermite knows how Jäger takes his coffee, what time he's more likely to be awake, and how he fixes his tools in the lab. Jäger knows where Thermite keeps his extra circuit boards, how many nieces he has, and that he learns languages quick. It's like they're old friends, trying to catch up for years' worth of time in only a few hours.

The excitement is contagious, how could anyone blame them?

One of the things that Jordan likes about Marius, is that he builds things that protect people without hurting others. Now, it would be nice if he could do the same, but it’s hard to stop doing something he’s good at it. On the other hand, Marius thinks that one of the best things about Jordan is how people tend to gravitate towards him, and how he welcomes it instead of turning them away. He also has some of the best jokes, when Marius understands them, anyway. 

───────

"Counterpoint: even if Mags can catch that, there's still a delay, right?" Opening his mouth to respond, there's a delay before Jäger refrains and closes it instead, sighing heavily. Looking over his schematics, he spreads them out on the table before pulling them back together into a neat stack. He taps the end of his pencil against the surface and moves to lean against it, facing Thermite who's seated on the counter across from him.

"Ja, it's— I'm working on it, Jordan." 

They've been testing various projectiles against the ADS because today is Jäger's day. It's a good opportunity for Thermite to experiment with different materials too, seeing what makes an effective blast and what the delay needs to be both before the Magpie gets it, and without risk to a teammate. It hasn't gone as successful as either of them wanted, but it's certainly been exciting. At times it is frustrating when an idea doesn't work the way either of them expect, but the inbetween is spent discussing movies, anything from an explanation of the automotive industry, to a documentary about the seasonal habits of salmon. Definitely not boring.

Thermite is covered in a layer of smoke and dirt from some mishaps and false starts. It's nothing too serious, but he's starting to think he looks downright silly from the way Jäger glances at him then looks away to laugh. Squinting, moves to lift his goggles and rub at the dirt on his face, reaching over to grab one of the rags at the side of the room.

"All I'm saying is either a modification to compensate for that could work, just look at that pile—" His words are muffled against the cloth as he makes a gesture away from him but when Jäger glances in that direction, he finds nothing. 

"Look at what? There's nothing there." He frowns as he looks back over, a brow raised while Thermite finishes wiping the rest of the dirt off his face. He looks only slightly better, considering the red imprint that the goggles have left.

"Huh? It's right—" Sliding the goggles back on, Thermite makes sure he can see before he fixes the grip, disappointed when he sees the same nothing that Jäger points out. "... Aww, man. Probably gonna need to check with Doc about these things. I meant over there, sorry Mar."

He motions to a different part of the room, slightly farther off from the first time. Jäger moves to the spot to check the bin of spare parts, making idle talk now.

"... What did you mean by 'these things', Jordan?"

"Oh, just the goggles. I've been better about safety, but I guess my prescription's acting up." Too caught in seeing if anything is compatible with the ADS, it takes a few beats before Jäger realizes what gets said. He looks up briefly, brows raised as he points towards Thermite's face.

"They're prescription?"

"Yeah!" Thermite flashes a grin before tapping the side of them. Tossing the rag back into the pile, he walks behind Jäger towards another bin, shrugging. "It was that or contacts, and those are kinda high maintenance on lab days." 

A shrug as he grabs a few rolls of butcher paper, walking over to Jäger so he can roll some of them out. "I never mentioned it, huh?"

Jäger shrugs before spreading the sheets out onto the table, lifting the Magpie up to join it so he can compare the notes made by the other man. 

"Not at all. It does explain why they never come off. Not that I'm complaining." Thermite whistles for that, tongue clicking as he leans a hand against the counter, watching as the suggestions on the blueprint get erased and written over.

"That's cold, Marius."

"You insulted the Magpie. I'm here for results, not to talk about your face, Jordan." He's grinning when he says it, glancing over. Thermite leans into him to tease and Jäger pushes back, content.

───────

Sometimes when Jordan can't sleep, he heads to the lab to mess around with projects. When his hands don't want to cooperate, he settles for drawing up plans at an empty station. 

Tonight, he's leaned over a blank sheet of butcher paper. There's no one else around, he gets a text and finds out it's Jäger trying to send him a file. It's notes about various compounds that he thinks could help with the next breach charge improvement, followed by a message unrelated to tech. It's a link to some documentary he's watching, asking if Jordan is interested. The third message is an apology for sending this so late, and that if this wakes him, Marius doesn't mean it.

Jordan laughs. He's leaning over the table, one hand moving to his hair while the other holds his phone, expression softening as he thinks of how to reply. There's a thought that comes to him in the silence and it makes him bite his lip before he decides to refrain from a reply. He shakes his head at himself, moving to leave the lab and see if he can sneak into GSG's quarters to give Marius his answer instead. (He brings popcorn, of course.) They spend the rest of the night watching this documentary about the virtual world and its impact on reality, while Jäger talks about the one he'd watched beforehand, talking about the potential breakthrough in armor tech. 

Jordan eventually falls asleep in an uncomfortable position hanging off the bed, and Marius laughs with him about it in the morning. 

Strangely, it's some of the best sleep he's ever gotten in a long time.

───────

Typically, when there’s new tech in play, they’re both one of the first operators asking if they can see schematics or oversee the testing, provided there’s time. Mira is exasperated every time, reasoning that she wants different opinions, which is why she doesn't always pick either of them, but she always prepares herself to say no. When Jäger is the only one to show up this time though, even Mute comments on it, saying that it’s Trace’s loss even if seeing only Jäger is strange. 

Naturally, Jäger worries. He doesn’t find Thermite that day, but he does manage to talk to Aruni for a little. She's mentions adjusting and how she's excited to be part of Rainbow, then they get down to the details. He asks about her prosthetics and what happened without thinking much about how that may come off, but luckily, Aruni is more than willing to share, unbothered by the circumstances that led to it despite the way that Jäger’s brow furrows, frown tight. 

Bangkok. A bomb in a car and a second vehicle that didn't expect it. 

───────

While it’s an unconventional situation, it doesn’t stop Jäger from drafting schematics, thinking on what-if scenarios. He’s seated outside on a crate, glancing out to the field surrounding the area every now and then to see if inspiration will hit. On the paper he's got a few streets drawn out, positions where the first car was heading and where the second car stopped it, but it's difficult to figure out where to go from there. 

He nearly jumps at the shadow that eclipses him without warning, relaxing only when he sees it’s Thermite. 

“Jordan- there you are.” Offering an easy smile, he scoots over for the other man who hops up onto it. Without missing a beat, Thermite leans over his shoulder to take a look, brow raised at the sketches. “Oh, maybe if I. If there's a shield—" 

He starts talking outloud to see if the ideas will bounce off Thermite even though he hasn't explained much. It doesn't stop him from moving to erase part of the street he’s sketched to make a different opening. He doesn't even seem to register how quiet Thermite has been since he arrived. Maybe that's part of why doesn’t hear his name the first time, but it takes a hand on his shoulder to keep Marius from tunneling on. 

“Huh? What is it?” Jäger blinks, glancing over. 

“What’s the situation for this? It’s pretty…. Specific.” He gestures to the placement of the vehicle on the sketch before moving to rub at the back of his hand, over the bandages. Jäger shifts to face Thermite, placing the papers inbetween them so they're easier to see. 

“Oh, well. I was talking to Aruni, the new addition from Nighthaven? We got to talking about her prosthetics —they’re a work of art, you know?— and that led to how she got them, which got me thinking.” He looks back down as he speaks, continuing to move the pencil again. (He doesn’t notice how Thermite’s eyes don’t leave the paper.) “I know, there’s a lot of variables to take into account, given how many types of bombs are out there, but if there’s a way to make bomb defusing safer, or even faster—” 

If he’s rambling, Thermite doesn’t seem to mind. The only thing that changes is when he reaches over to tug the draft away from Jäger. It's a gentle nudge but that's all it takes to get him to slow down. Jäger even passes the pencil over despite his confusion, but he doesn’t stop Thermite as the other man starts to erase the truck to redraw it. 

“It was going 120 kilometers— all asphalt with clear weather. Bomb was in the bed of the truck.” Jordan doesn’t look at him when he says that. (Marius isn’t sure he’s here at all.) 

“Yeah, Ar- she said that.” Brow furrowing, Jäger finds his hands curling without anything to do and instead he moves to twist and tug at the end of his sweater, focusing on the other man. He's worried, and his chest is tight, holding a breath he wants to let out. "Jordan?" 

“The driver has her back to the bomb, it's not even a meter from her. The idiot trying to defuse it should've pointed it toward the rear of the vehicle, but that would've been worse. It wouldn't have mattered if he cut the right wire— a bullet hits that thing and they're done. It doesn't matter if you need more time, not when there's a pressure plate and they get hit from the side by eight wheels.” He finishes the sketch and slides it along with the pencil back over to Jäger, eyes still down and voice rough. (The items stay untouched.) 

"... You were there." 

Thermite nods, rubbing at his face as he sits back. 

"I'm the one with the damn thing between my knees, but she gets the worst of the blast. How’s that supposed to make sense?" He holds up his hands for emphasis and Jäger commits the details to memory: every scar, every mark that he can make out under the bandages, and however else it affected Jordan. He's not a mind reader; he can only do his best to be there. When Thermite looks up at him finally, his jaw is tight and he swallows hard. "You're gonna make sure this doesn't happen again, yeah?" 

Marius reaches up to take both of Jordan’s hands, lacing their fingers before giving a squeeze. There’s no tension in the other man as he does so. 

"Ja. It's what I do. I build things better, safer." Jäger nods, and Thermite seems to believe him, based off how his shoulders drop. There's a beat, and he lets go to return to the sketch, picking the pencil back up. As he writes specific details in the margins, he glances over. "… Jordan? I don't think Aruni blames you." 

He doesn’t want to answer that and he doesn’t at first, because it feels like Marius put a bandage over the wound then ripped it off immediately (even if he didn't mean it). He brings his hands back in as Jäger works, fingers curling over the bandages as the memory plays over in his head. 

"... I know that now.” (He can remember every detail. The parts of the bomb he's stripped away, the circuit he's trying to break apart so he can defuse it, Tawanroong's voice breaking out over the sound of their truck. If he had more time, would it have changed anything?) He slumps back against the wall, looking towards the base so he can't see however Jäger's looking at him. "She would've been right to though, if she held it against me. She had to leave the force for PT, and who knows what else. On top of that, she runs back into the guy who let her down when she joins Rainbow." 

He reaches up to scrub at his face, taking in a slow breath. He knows it's not funny but if he looks over and sees Jäger, he doesn't know what he'll do. 

"She stopped replying to my messages when I was trying to keep in touch. I figured that was her way of telling me how she felt, but I saw her on the training field, earlier today. You know what happened? She came over to me, said 'It's been a while'. She still calls me her friend. The silence was just— she's a busy person. That's just how she is." Jordan laughs but it hurts to hear more than anything else, especially when Marius sees him rub at his hands from the corner of his eye. "But.. it doesn't go away immediately. 

Someone can say 'I forgive you', and you're supposed to feel relieved, right? But it doesn't— all the guilt, the bullshit you were holding onto? It's still there." 

“You couldn't have known. ” Jäger shifts the papers to the other side, away from them both so that he can scoot closer to Thermite. One hand goes to a shoulder and the other one slides inbetween his hands to keep him from touching his scars. He squeezes and watches the other man's face. 

“Heard that one before.” Even when Jordan speaks with his voice low and rough, he doesn't look at Marius. Not yet. Marius' brow furrows and he gives a small tug to try and make it happen because he needs to keep Jordan grounded. He can't let him clam up about this. 

"Why do you want it to be your fault?" That seems to be what hits the nail, because Jordan looks at him finally, he's not bitter, or angry. He's tired. Jordan Trace looks like a man who's trying to let go of the ghosts that have been haunting him, but he can't do it on his own. His confession is raw.

"Because if it _is_ my screw-up, then—" When Jordan finally looks up and over, he stops mid-sentence when he sees the way that Marius is looking at him. It's enough to make a man feel guilty that he even caused this much worry to begin with. His stomach turns at that he swallows the lump in his throat. (His hands are shaking around Marius' fingers.) "... Then that means I could have fixed it. That I _can_ fix it." 

It feels as if all the air has been knocked out of both of them. It's quiet, unbearable, but they need the break. Marius' mind is racing, thinking of all the things he can say for comfort, to knock him out of the self-pity, but of everything that's considered, nothing feels like it will work, like it will fix things for the other man. So instead, he reaches up and gets his arms around Thermite for a hug. There's no resistance, and Jäger can feel the other man lean into him, heavy.

"Jordan." Thermite brings hands up to curl fingers in his shirt, then he buries his face in the fabric. Jäger hugs him tighter for that. He'll make it better. "If you can't fix it, then I will."

───────

Jäger hears a knock at the door and looks up from his desk, sitting straighter when he sees Thermite standing there. He'd walked the other man back to SWAT's side of the base, only leaving when he was sure that Thermite wouldn't be alone. Even then it was hard but he'd managed to make it back to his room, tried to get back to his blueprints. They both look exhausted but Jordan's eyes are the ones that are swollen, glassy like he's been fighting against the aftermath of what happened early. Marius doesn't look that bad when compared, but his eyes do feel sore, and he's been restless ever since he got back, unable to focus. Seeing the other man helps. 

"Sorry about earlier, Mar." Jordan rubs at the back of his neck and Jäger scoots back, moving from the chair to sit onto his bed. He makes a motion for the other to join him and feels the mattress shift when the offer's taken. There's a smile but it's strained as he settles, then takes a breath. "You're a godsend, you know that? I appreciate it." 

"I feel the same way, Jordan. And I meant what I said, you know." At first there's confusion, Jordan's brow wrinkling as he frowns, mouth slightly open as if to ask 'what'. Instead, Marius elaborates and reaches over to touch one of his hands. He gives a squeeze, smiling bigger when Jordan turns the hand over to curl fingers around his. "I'll do my best to make sure something like that does not happen again. If I can make something safer, it works out, you know? Besides, good things should happen for people— you included."

Thermite stares for a moment, but then he shakes his head, sheepish. Even then he holds onto Jäger's while he scratches at a cheek.

"Geez, you're gonna embarrass me. At least take a guy out to lunch before you say something like that." The idea gets Marius to perk up more and he tilts his head, eager to get back to some sense of lightheartedness between them. 

"Do you want to? I'm sure we can still find a place even with the time—" 

Thermite interrupts Jäger before he gets too far in the idea; he leans in to kiss him. He isn't rejected for it and he pulls away after a moment, nervous while he watches Marius' face to see if there's an answer in his features. He speaks to give the other man some time, noticing that they're still holding hands.

"We're really good together, man." It takes a little longer but despite the blushing, Marius nods. His excitement is contagious.

"I think so too."


End file.
